Faggon Bals XYZ 4029
by Darkness Bloodblade
Summary: Ultra super pointy hair battle of ultimate destruction and doom 3: evil dark blood blade rises again, final battle: is it over 9000!
1. Episode 1

Ultra super pointy hair battle of ultimate destruction and doom 3: evil dark blood blade rises again, final battle: is it over 9000?!

Vegeta arises from his saiya people pod, the door opens and his crisp white boots meet the crushed corpses of the evil dark blood blade's victims. Dousing his armour in a velvet red ooze of entrails and guts as he touches down on the surface of the sacred heaven's bane, a planet plagued by dark blood blade's antics for so long.

"Wow, I thought I was a edgy boi!" Vegeta muttered to himself, the sound waves echosummfly throughout the catacombs of the cave he suddenly seems to be in.

"Well after my blade is done with you, all that will be left are the edges of you boi!"

A voice surprised veggie boy and a surprisingly small man ascends from the shadows, dark blood blade has arisen, he peels half a corpse of of his 8903 foot blade, and points it in Virginia's direction.

"I was expecting children in spandex to killer them, but my superior intelligence and fighting skill will make easy work of you, like a grape in the palm of my hand!" Vegeta yells into the darkness,

"Because I am virgin! Prince of all the spaccer warriors!"

"Well Vegena, the ability to speak does not make you intelligent, a brain like mine makes you intelligent!" The ominous voice called back to Vekkita.

"Wait, you... are J...Ji...Jimmy." Vegeta shudders.

"JIMMY NEUTRON!"

"That's correct vindictinny! And I will defeat you, once and for all!"

Narrator voice:"Will vvvvvvvvv defeat Nimmy Jewtron? Or will Jimmy and his ultimate soul-eating dragon slaying shadow the hedgehog blade of death and apocalypses make easy work of Vagoota?! Find out next time on Faggon bals XYZ 4029.


	2. Episode 2

The battle ensues, Vingt-et-un is being pushed back by the immense strength a spooky scary power of skeleton jimbo. Vagitaroo realises that he will lose if he lets Nimmy's onslaught continue... he must act now!? Vonitiga conjures the most mediocre fireball using his saiya people magic, and hurls it in the villainous air in Jimmy's direction.

"I cannot be hit by what I cannot see, vigutanod! Even your fireballs are useless!" Jimmy yelled as the big blast ball of death went right through his pelvis.

"Ironic, I'm supposed to thrush my pelvis into things, not the other way around, ahahahahahahahah!" Vaglitteroni is mildly upset, and sheds half a tear before saying,

"That's not very nice, say sorry please, my uncle may have taught me many moves in his bedroom, many moves in his closet, many moves in his cellar! But most importantly he taught me to have pride in the space warrior saiya people, ughahhh take this, fiNaL FlaSh!" Verogica removes his armour, revealing his saiya people pingas, magestic, beautiful, sexy if I do say so myself.

"Your final flash won't surprise me you jag! For I have seen it all before, I am that said uncle from that one time remember?!" Jimmy states to Vedingutee, ear-to-ear grin on his sinister, bony, blood-covered face. The man, the man that had given a sandwich to the prince of saiya people persons for so long was in front of Vapergoat, the terror suddenly came back to the prideful princes mind. He know he not win this battle anymore... it was over for him. A manly, booming voice echoes in the distance.

"Stop you have violated the law! Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence!"

Or so he thought...?!¿¡?...

Will Vaguniteebo be saved by this handsome sounding stranger? Will Skelton Jimmy slay the prince once and for all? How long will it take for Venutigoni to digest Jimbo's 8903 foot blade in his sexy saiya people stomach?! Find out next time on Faggon bals XYZ 4029!?


	3. Episode 3

The booming voice of the imperial guard grew closer, as jimbo and vaglitia grew more and more baffled and confused. How could someone still be alive on the Sacred Heaven's bane?

"I thought I cleansed this planet of all the non-Rick and Morty fans on this planet during the final battle!" Jimmy replied, visible confusion could be seen in his eye sockets. A sudden look of both shock and painful memories appears on the face of Vinoogy, how? How did his assistant survive for this long? After all this time.

"Nappa! What are you doing here? On the heaven's bane, I thinked I sent you to the next dimension on Earth!" He was amazed, baffled and distraught all at the same time, had his former friend and assistant come back to help him in the final battle?

"What's poppin' jimbo?! Hey vegetarian! The map lead me here." The once mysterious imperial guard, now known as Nappa boomed back, with a voice as manly as a redneck called Cletus on the 4th of May eating Taco Bell. A rustle could be heard from his pocket, then a map, a living map arose from Nappa and began to sing,

"If there's a place you gotta' go, I'm the one you need to know, I'm the map I'm the map I'm the map! If there's a place you gotta' get, I can get you there I bet, 'cuz I'm the map I'm the map I'm the map I'm the map I'm the ma-" his song and the awe-struck silence of Jimmy and Vigutwo was ceased by Jimbo charging up a mighty blast, his mightiest blast in fact.

"I'll have none of this, this is the final battle not a shoddy musical, no no no! You need to go go go! You gotta blast out of this final battle, this is the final battle between me and Valumpa! Now scram! Take this... Aggressive p-p-p-PIZZA!" Jimmy roars as he launches his greatest attack. It soars in the map's direction but is halted with just a stare, and the attack became nothing... the map stayed silent and just nodded to Nappa, who in turn pulled out two potato earrings. After both him and the map put them on, they collide in a blinding flash of blue light, dust swirling around them. The dust settles to reveal a new, fused warrior.

"All right! I think we'll call this...Mappa. You're going down Jimbo!" This new, all-powerful fighter has risen to combat the evil antics of the Skelton terrorising his planet. This final battle is finally getting serious.

"Ugh, wait! Gimme a minute, just gotta go for a second, wait up! Ugh." Vestigas' shocked silence was broken by a growl coming from his stomach. He dashes to the nearest pile of corpses and begins to shout and scream, is this a new power coming from Vutuyag aswell?

Will Vegaytor unleash his new power? How will this new warrior, Mappa fair against the evil Skelton Jimmy? The final battle may be over soon, but the real struggle of the final battle has only just begun?! Jimbo might be up to something, and it's so obvious, it stinks. Find out what next time on Faggon bals XYZ 4029.


	4. Episode 4

The final battle gets serious! The Dark Blood blade's rebirth, Jimbo becomes more strong?! The final battle?! Prince's red rage! Hot Russian Saiyans in your area?!$ Ultimate burst of power! The final battle ramps up to 71!

Vagritoi continued to yell, boundless energy being unleashed with each second. An awestruck Jimbo had never seen such power before the final battle, was Vanypok really capable of all this?!  
"Ah I see my friend has forgotten his constipation medication, looks like Virginity didn't drink plenty of juice with his push-ups and squats." Mappa didn't at all seem surprised by this sudden explosion of power from his old comrade.  
"Good job I brought this, Vaaaaaajida, I've brought your medication!" Mappa cheerfully stated  
"It's actually the only reason I came here. I know what Viagra's bottie gets like without his meds, he gets a sore tooshie, here you go, Veertoppo have this!"  
One year later, Viva Las Vegas accepts the offer to take his meds, because his ass, and I don't mean donkey XD, hurts like frick.  
"Thank you Mappa" Vinegar utters, too breathless to say anything else, as he eats the entire 279 space dollar gift card that Mappa won in a gift card giveaway. Within an instant, Velocity's sexy butt unloads, releasing an 8903 foot sword from his bowels. Then he releases 12 more. Jimbo has enough and leaves  
"Sorry guys, my mummy wants me to come home now, dinner's ready." He sadly states as he just walks off, "gotta blast".  
After a brief recovery, Vapeman is extremely baffled by the situation, was that it, did he win? Has the final battle finally finished finally? Maybe not, for in the distance, a voice echoed through the caverns of the heaven's bane.  
"Once when I was 7 years old, I sat on a 8903 foot blade, and of course...that changed my life." The final battle was yet to begin.

Who was this mysterious fighter set to take Jimbo's place? Why did Viimlopeenie have so many 8903 foot blades in his stomach?! What will the libtards think of this?! Find out next time on Faggon bals XYZ 4029!


	5. Episode 5

The arrival of the fiercest foe yet, who the frick? The final battle finally begins finally!? Voompaloompa and Mappa's last resort, mega ultra attack of big dooming devastation! Beyond space and time itself? Top 5 Faggon bals XYZ 4029 episodes, you won't believe number 5!

Shock... Complete and utter shock. That was the only emotion Mappa could express, speechless at the sheer power of this new foe. A limitless pool of strength and energy leaked from this mysterious enemy. On the other hand, Vacuum was confident, after his recent bowel movement, he was ready for anything, his limiter had been pooped out following the 8903 foot blades. The space warrior prince was proud once more, he wasn't the average space warrior anymore.  
"Well I can see why you handled my crappy son so easily, he obviously inherited his mother's measly power level" the ominous voice spoke, then a shadow came to light, it was none other than the legendary warrior spoken of in legends throughout all of time...The Great Hugh Neutron!?  
"Don't worry, I'll finish his awfully done job, with ease, my power level engulfs his millions of times over, after all that goes without saying, my relentless training had prepared me for a fight with a space warrior prince. Vuhjioombas, I... HUGH NEUTRON, HAVE SUCCESSFULLY STEPPED ON 2 LEGO BLOCKS AT THE SAME TIME! Prepare to meet with death himself." Mappa was in such awe by this, that he died, he had actually died 20 minutes previously, that's how awesome Hugh was, but Ved Flangeta didn't care, he had a reputation to maintain, and an ass to rub soothing cream onto, he had to finish this quickly.  
"Hugh Neutron, you are not dealing with the average spooky warrior anymore, my dad works for Nintendo! And he told me that Sonic is in melee! You are done for, you pathetic, puny trash! That's all you are. I will crush you like a cactus between my butt cheeks, you are nothing." Voogylooha hastily yelled back, he knew that this claim was false, his Buttocks was too sore to handle a cactus, never mind crushing it, he was not the average space warrior anymore, and he had to prove it, however he had to keep his wits about him, he never knew what would happen next, with a foe written down in legend as the most unpredictable fighter in history.  
"Vafagoota, it was nice talking to you, but I must reclaim my throne" Hugh quipped, "my throne... as the true user of the darkness bloodblade! Behold my unlimited strength!" He picked up the 8903 foot blade from the corpse covered ground, instantly getting to grips with a sword that was once his.  
"Um, you know that's come out of my ass, right? I wouldn't touch that if I were you." Vincent Van Gogh chimed in. Slight smirk on his face, he couldn't wait to get home to his roblox girlfriend and make all the babies after this.  
"No matter, for I do not care. I have the ability to instantly sanitise any 8903 foot blade that I come into contact with, INSTANTLY. It's rather specific, but it works with me." Hugh had a counter to anything that any opponent threw at him, just like what the books of legend said. The bible, Mein Kampf and the hungry caterpillar. The legends were all true. As the mightiest worriers in the universe stood on the Sacred heaven's bane, the sun began to rise, for the first time in 10 minutes... pistols at dawn, just as it should be.  
"Yee and I cannot emphasise this enough... HAW." Hugh was ready, to shoot, with the gun he didn't have.  
"This sacred heaven's bane ain't big enough for the two of us." Vsauce replied, toothpick in mouth, garlic gun in holster. The final battle was about to get serious, or start, or end, whatever a final battle does nowadays.

When will Will Smith arrive into the Wild Wild West? When will Venison make it home to his roblox girlfriend to make the babies? What the frick is a Sonic?! Find out next time on Faggon bals XYZ 4029


	6. Episode 6

Vegg vs Hugh, the warrior of legend, the most finalest, gun-slingin', death defyin' battle of limitless, ultimate rootin' tootin', gun shootin', Vladimir Putin, ISIS recrutin', parachutin', prostitutin', bus commutin', non-pollutin', persecutin', gamer-salutin', rootin' tootin' again, the final battle?!

The break of dawn on the Sacred Heaven's Bane only means one thing in these parts. Both Vhuigyyto and Hugh knew this, a solitary bead of sweat trickles down Hugh's forehead, whilst a solitary stream of urine trickles down the leg of Vindaloo. They were both trembling with excitement and anticipation, or were they really shaking with anxiety and regret? They couldn't tell the difference. A singular tumbleweed drifts across the horizon as the two warriors thought in unison.

Pistols. At. Dawn.

Ten steps would decide the fate of the most powerful fighters in the universe. Ten steps. One shot. This is it. With no hesitation, both Hugh and Vandalism turned away from one another, as dust spiralled around them, like a swirling whirlpool of dirt. And they began to walk. One step at a time.

One. Many thoughts dart through Veduyammate's mind. His brain cloudy with what could potentially happen.

Two. Hugh was prepared, his unwavering confidence worn upon his face, in his eyes and in his smile.

Three. Vacation thought back to his Wild Wild West experience. Putting himself in Will Smith's shoes. What would he do? He frantically thought to himself. He was going straight to the Wild Wild West. Straight. To. The . Wild. Wild West.

Four. Hugh considered what he was going to do after this final battle was over. Tacos perhaps? A bike ride, or a killing spree? Inner conflict ensues within his mind. Cloudy with a shroud of indecision.

Five. Damn. Why'd I have to go and wet myself? This is the only saiyan armour I have with me, Vwerty thought to himself. He soils himself in panic and frustration.

Six. I wonder how Jimbo is doing, Hugh pondered on that for a second. Before returning to not caring about his son.

Eight. Vader was humming along to himself. He has a always been known for his mood swings. Then it hit him.

"Oh crumpy craps! I skipped seven." He growled in rage toward his own stupidity.

"Don't worry Vaneer'n'ere, I skipped one through three-hundred." Hugh quickly chirped back "so I'm sure that it's fine."

Hugh had utilised his spaghetti legs to do three-hundred and four steps in the time it took Viiwiitii to do seven. Hugh was known for his legendary feats, his unimaginable speed wasn't surprising. Veyootyboo was extremely surprised by his unimaginable speed. Hugh has done so many steps that his pedometer has exploded from extreme overuse, and was now stood in front of Ventriloquy. He'd trekked across the entire Sacred Heaven's Bane in seven seconds. Vategev had to act fast, he had to end this quickly before Hugh did something else, before he utilised his boundless strength once again.

"Ten!" Valentine's Day shrieks as he raises his spud gun and takes a shot, a small speck of potato glides through the air, fire trailing behind it. A blaze of glory coating the bullet, the catalyst of Hugh's inevitable defeat soars through the air, Hugh catching the starchy round in his mouth, before saying.

"A spud gun? A spud gun of all things?! I'm offended that you thought you could defeat me, even harm me with a pathetic spud gun!" Hugh berated ventriculocordectomy in a single, rage filled breath, rage was the only thing on his enraged mind, did I mention he was angry? After he'd finished yelling, Hugh took a deep breath, a gasp for air, but that's when the spud speck striked. Lodging itself in Hugh's throat, causing him to sputter and choke. He turned blue, then green, then purple, then green again, then pink, then yellow, then some sort of bluey-green, then black. When his final thought to himself was that since he was black, he could say the n-word. He then proceeded to say the n-word and die the instant after, bursting into a ball of kittens, which then burst into a ball of flames.

"Ahahahaha! A legendary warrior defeated by his weak throat game, just as the books of legend stated, the art of the deal, Harry Potter and the communist manifesto! Ahahahaha! Victory for Vasectomy." The proud space warrior prince was basking in the glory of his victory over a being that was beyond any other being in the universe, in all universes in fact.

"That was a pretty good shot!" Mappa said while dead on the floor. Whilst the celebrations began, something truely evil began bounding towards vehicle. Its essence full of raw, deadly energy, but nobody sensed it, it slowly approached the Saiya person and struck him with the force of a supernova.

"God dammit, tumbleweed!" Various cried as the bundle of dried, dead plants bounced away into the distance. And the proud, saiya person prince fell, and lost consciousness .

The end may be near. Is this it? Was this the end of his story, the end of his long, difficult struggle? Was this truly the end of Vinglypoogybob? Find out next time on Faggon Bals XYZ 4029.


	7. Episode 7

Sorrow.

Velociraptor just lay there, on the surface of the Sacred Heaven's Bane in shock, he'd just defeated a foe unlike any other. But regardless, the writings of legend must have been incorrect, Hugh wasn't invincible, but neither was Viupennies, a tumbleweed, a tumbleweed had taken him out. His consciousness...fading. His vision... blurring. His life... ending. His palms... sweaty. His knees... weak. His arms... heavy. Vomit... on his saiyan armour already. Nappa's spaghetti. Vugyovy felt like he was falling, tumbling into an infinite abyss, was this the sensation of being dead? Memories began to appear around a dazed Veteranny, flashes of light, positive dreams of what once was, and pits of deep darkness, the stained past of a scarred, corrupted warrior. Was this is? Is this it? The saiya-prince began to think of his family, his kind, caring family who he may never see again. His children, who looked up to him, those who he truly loved, and those who truly loved him. Was this it? Is this is?

His wife, his world. The only one who saw his love for her, the person he shared his weakness with and the only one who really cared, and understood him, an Earth woman with the will of a space warrior. Was this it? Is this it?

Kakarot... his greatest rival, but his greatest friend, a fellow saiya-person who truly resonated with him, who shared his primal instincts and the desire to grow and to fight. "I ne...never hated you ka...kaka...rot" Vulnerability uttered, Kakakakadachikazerot pushed him to greater heights, and thanks to Gek, Vanguard had reached this new power, a power great enough to vanquish the legendary fighter, Hugh Neutron. Was this it? Is this it?

Then suddenly, Videographer's body became light, weightless even, his eyelids growing heavy, the abyss grew deeper, his memories fading. This felt like the end, but then a desire grew in the prince's heart, a fire that consumed even death itself, he didn't want to die, he didn't want to lose what he had, lose it all to a pathetic, measly tumbleweed. Pride kept him clinging on, for his family, for his friends. He is Vulture, he cast aside nothing, not even his own life. He was a true survivor, a truck freak, a crazy ass and the fighter, but most importantly he was a warrior. No, a spaceman warrior.

Then, it happened... The internal fire became a burst of flame around V's fragile body, his body's weight came back, his memories came back, he was back. A surprising burst of energy and strength and energy and strength and power had exploded in the abyss, the darkness was coated, banished by the light that emitted from the warrior reborn, like a pheonix, Voice had returned to life. The abyss disappeared, and Very's eyelids opened to see the dreary, stormy sky of the Sacred Heaven's Bane, the rain gently stroking the prince's armour with each drop, a relaxing break from all the fighting and near-death experiences.

Utter disbelief shrouded the mind of Voting booth, how did he survive? Did he survive? This thought was quickly interrupted by his pride intervening. Of course he survived, he was the prince of all Spacs after all, nothing could kill him now. After a wave of prideful ranting, he felt rather humbled by his thoughts whilst slipping into the abyss. Thinking of his family, and his friends, rather than himself. He stood and stared into the horizon of a dark Sacred Heaven's Bane, solitary, isolated and ponderous. Vraiment had changed. He wasn't just a father, a husband and a friend, he was a true fighter, a proud prince and a prideful warrior. He was Vegeta.

A near death experience humbles the Prince of all Saiya people person men and female warriors. He contemplates what happens next alone on a planet all by himself. What happened to the ominous tumbleweed? Do all monkeys go to heaven? And does Viospoopy deserve a juice box or something? Like dudes, he nearly died, he at least deserves some juice, orange? Yea, orange. Find out next time on Faggon Bals XYZ 4029.


End file.
